Need good advice and/ or a Good Lawyer?

My ex wife has been living with her new boyfriend and they are engaged for almost two years. They have not gotten married nor does it seem like they are going to. My child support was built around her being a single mother of two - on her salary (schoolteacher) - paying all her own expenses. She actually brought me to court almost two years ago to get an increase - which she did.


Now she is living with him (he is a doctor) - still making her salary - has less expenses (no car payment) and my support is till at the higher rate.


Do I have any options??


Note: She moved away from me 3 years ago (out of state) and I had to sell our house and move also so I could be near my kids (big expense for me and higher cost of living adjustment). In addition to my support - I pay for their Health and Dental Ins. AND she still asks me to pay for other items such as back to school clothes, supplies, etc.


Help me please. I cannot put any money away for my Kid's future.

Need good advice and/ or a Good Lawyer?
First of all, if you are paying child support you are not responsible for paying for extras...that's what HER money is for. Child support is for things your kids need, roof over their head, food, clothes..not extras that they can live without. As to the part about her living with someone else, they may be living together, he may be supporting her, but until they are married his (the boyfriend) income is not considered in your child support figures. When my ex husband and I were going through our divorce, he tried to say that because I had a boyfriend that my boyfriends income should be added in with mine to figure how much child support he pays. In my situation I was responsible for all my own bills, my boyfriend did not pay my bills, nor did the room mate I shared my apartment with. When we went to court, my ex husband told the judge that I had a boyfriend, told him that my boyfriend lived with me, I stated that was true. However, until they (your ex and the boyfriend) are married, the boyfriend's income does not count towards what you do or don't pay. Once they are married however, then his income will get figured in with hers. I know that's probably not what you wanted to hear, but in my situation that was how the cards fell. Now, every state is different, and every judge is different. If you are concerned, contact a lawyer and see what your rights are in this situation. The thing I'm curious about though, is if you are paying your child support to take care of your children, why are you concerned with how much you are paying? Are your children worth less to you just because their mother might be making more now than she was before? These are your children, and no amount of money, and paying less money will not change that. It is your obligation to help take care of them, regardless of what the mother is doing.
Reply:REFUSE TO PAY FOR EXTRA'S!!! This is what your child support is for and if she is so well off then she shouldnt be asking for it anyways. Id see a lawyer asap!
Reply:Discuss it with your lawyer. You have responsibilities as does she. You have your rights too and a lot going in your favour.
Reply:Get a decent lawyer, although that may be hard to find.I think the best option is to go back to court and explain the situation fully. If you take a lawyer who knows his stuff you may get a reduction in payments becase of the circumstances you outlined.


Good luck
Reply:it might help to know where u are from. u do not have to pay for the extra expenses that is in with the child support. also the insurance u would ahve to pay. when they get married is when ur increase should lower.








Check this source out it is a calculator for all states It helps u define what u should really be paying. THis women is cleaning the streets with u





http://www.alllaw.com/calculators/Childs...
Reply:That's selfish she's bitter and greedy, you should only be giving her $300 per child and that's it and if you buy something you should deduct it from that money, you shouldn't have to pay for her and them that's highway robbery. My ex husband gives me $500 a month, pays his insurance and does some shopping for our son but I don't ask for any extras he has to live too.
Reply:uh...only pay what the court has ordered you to pay. plain and simple. and even if she married Bill Gates or Donald Trump what her new husband makes is of no concern of yours or the courts.





you can ask for a re-evaluation for support. that never hurts. she would have to prove she is paying for all of her expenses such as car payments and such. if you have more expenses redo the Income and Expense form. as much as it sucks, any savings accounts or college funds for the kids is still kind of listed as disposable income for the children. technically, it's her responsibilty to save some of the child support money for their college if she so chooses.
Reply:I think that the medical and health care benefits should compensate some of these expenses off your payment. In CA they do include your health care for your children. There is a reason for her not being married yet and that is why. When she does in fact get married you should know your alimony stops. Your child support does not however. You should re-open and re-modify the payments. Keep in mind that the judge will over see the fact that she has a well off fiance. The only thing the court really wants to see in order to favor your stipulation is your consistency, and the actual necessities involved. Meaning, you can request receipts for all she claims to purchase for the children. If that does not add up to what your paying in payments or near enough to justify your contributing a substantial amount of money the judge may just favor you. Save all of your receipts and any extra itinerary add them up, get an attorney and request that you have a fixed budget strictly for your children so she can't use or see a penny of that ... Good luck
Reply:Find out what the common law marriage laws are in your state and her state and talk to an attorney. Also know your divorce laws. Many states now this available online. You may be able to get a reduction, but maybe not. Depends on the laws in your state and maybe even hers. Every state is different. You may get some answers from www.findlaw.com
Reply:maybe its different in different states, but this is what i've found true in oklahoma.....





child support is based only on the father and mothers personal income. any income from other relationships cant be included in determining child support.





i have done some research on parents taking their kids and moving. a parent has to have permission from the other parent to take a child out of the state they live in, especially if you have court orders that specify when you have visitation, etc. this applies to any state. she cannot take your kids and move wherever she wants. that obstructs your visitation and could get her in big trouble. you can google 'custodial interference' and find a lot of information that may be useful. could even be considered a misdemeanor or a felony.





also, in oklahoma, you would have to give her permission to have that guy around your kids. i believe the time cut off is 10pm. they cant be in the house past that time without your permission, let alone live with your kids without your permission and without being married to your ex-wife.





you paying for their insurance is not unusual. here, that is normal.


as for the school supplies and extra costs, that is what your child support is for. she cant demand more money from you without going to court and having the courts order you to do so.





for now, stop doing everything she tells you to do. she cannot legally demand anything without going back to court and getting official court orders.
Reply:That's a good question, Scott. Don't hesitate in contacting a lawyer. A lot of them give free initial consultations so you can at least see if there is anything you can do without having to pay them. Good luck. When you call just ask them if the first appointment/interview is free of charge.